Tuesday, January 16, 2018, 8:00am

5TtRT: Donald Trump, Mario Batali, Mars, Cape Town & a Twitter novel


“People will visit Mars, they will settle Mars, and we should because it’s cool.” – Jeff Bezos

We went out to eat this weekend and while we were at the restaurant, I spotted three different ladies with the most gawdawful drawn-on eyebrows I’ve ever seen. Like this, only worse, like they’d been painted on with a stencil.

After we left I said to Jim, “Is that a thing? The eyebrows like that?” He assured me that, unfortunately, that is a thing. Apparently this is what the college women are doing.

College women, do not do that. It’s awful. Please stop. I’m not saying that because I’m old and out of touch, although I am old and out of touch, I’m saying that because it looks awful. Google Image Search assures me that this trend isn’t supposed to look like you’ve hosed your eyebrows on with a paint sprayer and a stencil. If that’s what it looks like when you do it, you should probably practice more before you wear that out.

5 Things to Read Today (1/16/18)

The Atlantic: Trump Under Oath Is a Different Person
“Assuming the deposition occurs, Trump will make political history as only the fifth sitting president to be deposed, following in the footsteps of Ulysses Grant, Gerald Ford, Jimmy Carter, and, most consequentially Bill Clinton—whose lie about not having a sexual relationship with Monica Lewinsky in a 1998 deposition led to his impeachment.”

Everywhereist: I Made the Pizza Cinnamon Rolls from Mario Batali’s Sexual Misconduct Apology Letter
“And of course, the glaring question is why? Was his PR team drunk? Is life suddenly a really long, depressing SNL sketch? Do these cinnamon rolls somehow destroy the patriarchy? Does the icing advocate for equal pay? I figure the only way to answer these questions is to make the damn rolls.”

NPR: Thick, ‘Rather Clean’ Ice Sheets Are Spotted On Mars
“Scientists say that images from Mars show large slopes of ice — and provide a hint at how they were formed. One likely theory involves snowfall on the Red Planet.”

Time: Cape Town Is 90 Days Away From Running Out of Water
“After three years of unprecedented drought, the South African city of Cape Town has less than 90 days worth of water in its reservoirs, putting it on track to be the first major city in the world to run out of water. Unless residents drastically cut down on daily use, warns Cape Town Mayor Patricia De Lille, taps in the seaside metropolis of four million will soon run dry.”

Oliver Willis is writing a novel on Twitter.
Oliver Willis is a writer for ShareBlue, and he’s writing a political novel featuring the current administration as well as other well known political players and celebrities – on Twitter. Makes for a bit of a hassle to read, but it’s been fun so far. Here’s the first thread, and here’s the second thread.

Daily Cute: Baby sea otter!

Baby sea otter coming at ya!

But wait, where do I comment? No comments, sorry. Talk to me on Facebook or Twitter, instead.

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